Spike's Ex: "I'm Heartbroken!"

[xshollywood.livejournal.com]

Yesterday, Excess Hollywood broke the story that Angel and Spike, the Vampire Heroes of Los Angeles, are romantically involved... with each other! Today, all of Tinseltown is buzzing with the news—including Team Angel spokesperson and Spike's ex-girlfriend, Harmony Kendall.

"It's bad enough that he's a Slayer-loving freak!" sobbed Kendall, in an exclusive interview with Excess Hollywood. "But to find out that he's sleeping with my boss... that's just... UGH!"

In retrospect, Kendall said she should have known that the two vampires with souls were an item. "I mean, I could smell Spike every time I walked into Angel's office. And Angel showered way too much. Why does a vampire need to shower three times a day? We don't even sweat!"

Kendall was Angel's personal assistant while he was still the CEO of Wolfram & Hart. She now works as Angel's publicist. "Angel hired me because he said he didn't want to deal with the press," Kendall raged. "Well, now I know why! He's been too busy screwing my ex-boyfriend to take anyone's calls!"

When asked if either Angel or Spike would confirm their relationship, Kendall replied, "They're unavailable for comment."

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Comments

[kita0610.livejournal.com]

There is no end to my love for you.

[xshollywood.livejournal.com]

Aren't you supposed to be chasing down that lead for next week's cover story? GET BACK TO WORK!

(P.S. <3)

[kita0610.livejournal.com]

I've got a photo essay in the works for this Sunday's pullout.

(<3)

[apetslife.livejournal.com]

OH MY GOD. Harmony is Angel's PUBLICIST??? Oh my god, and of course she's shrieking to the press! AHAHAAHAH! Oh god, this is the best thing EVER!

[lynnenne]

Heeeeee. Kita and I decided that making Harmony his publicist would lead to all kinds of great "quotes." She's the best interview subject ever!

[laisserais]

<3<3<3

[xshollywood.livejournal.com]

Thank you! Keep reading! We need the eyeballs to satisfy our advertisers.

[of-too-minds.livejournal.com]

*giggles insanely at the thought of Harmony as Angel's publicist*

Brilliant.

[xshollywood.livejournal.com]

Thank you!

[trepkos.livejournal.com]

AH, Harmony - ever the professional!

[xshollywood.livejournal.com]

She's our new favorite publicist in town!

[a-mistletoe.livejournal.com]

How did Harmony get that gig? Of course she's a journalist's dream. Angel must have ulterior motives, or he's too sexed up to care. Tee heee.

[xshollywood.livejournal.com]

Angel is uncomfortable with all the media attention. We think Harmony's a natural!

[brutti-ma-buoni.livejournal.com]

More! More! Harmony speaks out on Spander issues is just...fabulous!

[xshollywood.livejournal.com]

And she looks fabulous, too!

[brunettepet.livejournal.com]

Poor, put upon Harmony. Spike just keeps disappointing her. Harm switching back from hysterical sobbing to publicist mode in that last line was hilarious.

[cafedemonde.livejournal.com]

HEEE! Harmony's the best!